Our conscious identities are not the sum of us, they are the tip of the iceberg of our larger selves. They aren’t even consistently the same as the crystal of ourselves rolls around in the dark waters of the deep to show a different facet in different contexts. That illusion of persistence is part of the necessary function of that conscious subsystem of our selves.
The conscious part is there as an oversight, a monitor, of the overall bodymind system. Consciousness is a blurry abstracted system map of the dynamic whole at the moment as prioritized by our unconscious expectation for situations that SEEM like this one.
Those expectations act as filters on the sensory signals we notice and the actions we perceive as possible in the moment. The schemas we are working within form that box that we are so often told to think outside of. I don’t know about you but it seems to me that after being told to, “think outside the box,” I rarely hear, “and here’s how!”
So… here is one way how. Meditation. Of course saying this over used word is nearly useless, so let me explain further what I mean.
Find your self a space and time where you can be safe, comfortable and undisturbed. Remove as much sensory distractions as you can. TURN YOUR PHONE OFF! Find a posture that keeps your spine straight, your breathing free and the rest of your body comfortable and relaxed.
Now breathe. Breathe full, smooth, relaxed breaths. Attend the breathing, be with it. Close your eyes.
The experience of your breathing is the pure signal of your bodymind state. Problems with the flow of breath are kinks in the system, nonverbal expressions of learned expectations. Thoughts that arise are verbal and visual expressions of those expectations. If you notice them, accept and let them go. A mantra can help here. Try, “And that’s okay.” Sometimes they will relax away when you do that. Sometimes they won’t. Either way is okay. Accept and let go. Attend breathing.
Even ten minutes a day will go a long way towards relaxing the schema box. In any situation, pausing long enough for four relaxed breaths will help you connect to this resource in the moment.